The Pocket Guide to Mischief Book

I have a mischievous nature but the older and fatter I’ve become, the less mischief I’ve been capable of managing (don’t sue me, Potter). This is, of course, deeply upsetting to someone who loves a bit of japery but I’ve decided to try and reinvigorate my mischievous nature by investing in a copy of The Pocket Guide to Mischief by Bart King. The fact that it has a catapult on the front cover is a slight cause for concern as, being a regular on the London Underground, I can’t help but think I’ll be face down on the platform under the knee of a armed police officer pretty sharpish and my defence of “but my Pocket Guide to Mischief said that it was cool” is unlikely to be gratefully received by the old boys in blue. I think it is a bit more difficult to be mischievous in today’s day and age (and being a grown, albeit frightfully immature, man). This doesn’t mean that I shouldn’t be swotting up on the art of mischief, however, as I dare say that there will be a time when mischief is actively encouraged once again. And, as they say, in the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is king. Or, perhaps more accurately in this case, in the land of the mischievous, the guy who’s read the book will be the biggest twat, probably.

I didn’t realise that mischief was inspired by the Oxford Dictionary. Those bookworms have got a lot to answer for.