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Impossible Instant Labs
Taking photos isn’t as fun as it used to be when you used to take a shit-tonne of pictures on a camera with no digital display (or flying blind as I like to call it) so you had no idea whether you’d captured that squirrel with its knob out or that poignant memory when you […]
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Duff Beer
To be quite honest, I’ve been watching Homer Simpson drink Duff Beer for the last 15 years or so now with a quiet reverance towards the sort of scrapes and escapades that he gets himself into under the influence of Duff – or under the “Duffluence” as it’s doubtless called. This has led me to […]
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Rhino Shield
I remember, back in the day, when I could play Snake on my indestructible Nokia mobile phone one minute whilst shouting “Oi, catch” to my brother as I toss it to him from the top of a tree or some shit, only to see it bounce, utterly unscathed, from the ground like a proper tough […]
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GTA V
I have long since suspected that I have criminal tendencies ever since I lay in wait in the bushes to carjack my brother’s Go-Kart at the age of about 8. Given he is three years older than me and roughly twice my size, said carjacking didn’t go altogether too well a hasty retreat was beaten. […]
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Pretentious Beer Glasses
I’m a bit of a knob when I drink, truth be told. I start doing the Robot (under the mistaken impression that what I’m doing resembles a robot), I speak increasingly louder without noticing that I’m doing so and I demand to stop at every takeaway on the way home for a portion of cheesy […]
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Fickle Tattoos
I’ve often considered getting a tattoo but given my innate and highly rational fear of needles, I’ve never quite had the courage (nor been quite drunk enough) to take the plunge. I think it’s probably always more sensible to take things for a dry-run in order to make sure you don’t look like a complete […]