Blue Sky Crystal Meth Candy

I don’t watch Breaking Bad, not because I don’t want to, I think it looks great, I just don’t want to sully the reputation of Hal in my mind. Ironically, the non-Malcolm ones i.e. the two not in the middle are probably literally slinging rock nowadays, because I certainly haven’t seen them on television in quite some time. And drug dealing is, as we all know, the only career path for a failed TV star. *

* I tried to set up my own undercover sting operation to catch Reece and Dewey in the act. I think I did it wrong though because a] I didn’t know how to find the pair so, obviously, they didn’t show up and b] the police arrested ME and I had a loooooooot of drugs on my person. Which they seemed pretty pissed about.

Now, I’m not normally a candy kind of guy, as I value owning all my own teeth, but there is one thing that can tempt me into eating sweets, it’s ones that masquerade as drugs paraphenalia, so it is difficult to see why I’ve been tempted by this awesome Blue Sky Crystal Meth Candy from Firebox. As I’m not a habitual drug user (except, of course, my Guinness addiction) I’m not really aware of the supposed side effects from a quick dabble in crystal meth but, I think I can confidently assert, that the Unicorn with an uzi that is currently prancing around my bathroom is a little out of the ordinary, no?

Update: It wasn’t a friendly unicorn unfortunately. Stabbed me up pretty good with its stupid horn. I would have used the uzi if I was him.

99.1% pure? Sloppy work by the cooks there methinks.