Moustache Salt & Pepper Shakers

moustache salt

Whilst my table manners are far from refined, I like to create the illusion of civility and, given that I eat like a ravenous, ravenous hippo (I’ve got this idea for a board game – I’ll tell you about it later), I need to use props in order to establish this illusion of refinement at the dinner table. I have been carrying out some multi-variate testing over the last few weeks by using a multitude of different props and seeing which my dinner guests (I paid people to have dinner with me) felt gave the most impressive air of refinement and sophistication at the dinner table. The winner by a country mile was the wonderfully eccentric Moustache Salt and Pepper Shakers by Jonathan Adler above which left my dinner guests questioning whether I was, in fact, royalty such is their level of regality. I assume that it is common knowledge that having a moustache makes you one dapper bastard which makes it all the more upsetting that I am utterly incapable of growing a moustache because I am the dapperest of all the bastards. I’m more than happy to have these moustachioed salt and pepper shakers prove my masculinity, however, and I intend to overcompensate for my lack of moustache growing skills by putting a shit-tonne of salt on all my food.

Update: My blood pressure was not amused at the sudden spike in my salt intake and I’ve been taken ill.

whale salt

If, for whatever reason, you hate moustaches (such as, they tickle) then get one of these whale bad boys instead.

Comments are closed.