In a message largely akin to Grumpy Cat’s “I had fun once….it was terrible”, I had a warm beer once and, well, let’s just say there was some unpleasantness and I was asked never to return to Nandos. So, it’s everyone’s best interests that I don’t succumb to the abomination that is warm beer again and, as luck would have it, some beer quaffing fellows from Florida have come up with a fancy little device (I say “fancy” though, from what I can make out, it entails attacking your beer can with a drill) that goes by the name of Spin Chill that will, in a matter of moments, turn a dickhead warm beer into a suave and sophisticated ice cold one in a little process that I like to call “Magic”. Or it spins it real quick and it gets cold or some shit. Either way, if it prevents me from having to drink warm beer again, I’m all aboard the beer express. That’s what you should have called it, chaps – Beer Express. Missed a trick there lads. You can buy that off me for $40. I don’t own it.
Not going to lie, I probably shouldn’t be doing this when drunk. Asking for trouble.