After watching the documentary, Harry and the Hendersons, in the early 90’s, I came to the conclusion that owning a yeti / bigfoot / sasquatch would be pretty great. Needless to say, I’d have to make peace with him leaving giant turds in the sink and that because I think, with yeti ownership, the positives far outweigh the negatives. For example, if you have a yeti, you can go in the carpool lane, use it as a gentry whilst you’re at work (I know it’s you getting in my bins, squirrel) and I think we can all agree that a lesser-spotted mountain man would make a rather awesome drinking buddy – I bet they’ve got all sorts of comical tales about douchebag park rangers trying to capture them.

But this leads us onto the most pressing problem of how and where to source a yeti. Well, the how, whilst previously impossible, is now devilishly easy courtesy of this rather spiffing SquatchIT! Device doing the rounds on Kickstarter. Just give it a toot or two and have a shit-tonne of yetis crawling out of the woodwork. As for the where, I don’t know – I’m not a fucking YGPS (Yeti-Global-Positioning-System). Go in the woods or something.

squatchit caller

If it’s good enough for Brian Blessed, it’s good enough for me.

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