Nike Fuel Band

Nike Fuel BandOK, so those big shots over at Nike think they’ve got what it takes to succeed where the likes of PE teachers, my parents, my fitness obsessed sibling, my girlfriend and doctors and that have failed so consistently in the past (and present) i.e. compelling me to do exercise and get fit. To be honest, I’m much more likely to be swayed by an inanimate (or semi-animate) device calling me obese than people saying “are you sure you want that whole chocolate cake?”. Of course I do. The rather snazzy looking Nike Fuel Band is set to rile, upset, alienate and frustrate fitness-dodgers the world over with its invasive (some may some perverted) tracking of your day to day activities (how in the hell it knew about those hob-knobs squirrelled away in my desk is beyond me). It will ask you at the beginning of the day what level of NikeFuel (which I assume is cocaine or some such) you wish to accomplish for the day and help you to make that goal a reality – most likely through shouting abuse at you on the street from the wrist strap device. Mine made me do the Truffle Shuffle outside of Old Street Station the other day. Made a couple of quid in tips, so it wasn’t all bad. It can be synchronised with your iPhone and that too so your smartphone can get in on the abuse act.

Nike Fuel Bands

Wait, you can play STEPS on it?! Count me in, Nike, count me in.

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