Ressence Type 3 Watch

Ressence Type 3 Watch

A watch with no hands or crown and filled with liquid would have been seen as witchcraft back in the day but we’re living in a more informed age nowadays which is why we are now being treated to the insanely awesome Ressence Type 3 Watch above. It’s upsetting that, just when I think I’ve mastered telling the time, a watch like this comes along and throws a spanner in the proverbial works. There’s a hell of a lot of numbers on this bad boy and when you throw liquid and the fact the “obital indicators are bathed in fluid” into the mix, it’s safe to say that whenever someone asks me the time from now on I will retreat to the corner of the room and gently sob whilst rocking back and forth. That should get them off my back and get them to ask some other sucker the time in the future. It is difficult to articulate just how much I want this watch but my reasons for wanting it are plentiful – said reasons include:

  • I want to talk into it like Ziggy in Quantum Leap saying things like “Maybe your next leap will be the leap home, Sam”.
  • It glows in the dark and that which will be perfect staging UFO sightings.
  • It will reignite my love affair with trigonometry with its weird angles and numbers.
  • It looks pretty cool.
  • If I got lost in the desert, or woods, I can drink it.

Of course, this is just a brief synopsis of the reasons I want to have this awesome looking timepiece upon my wrist but the rest escape me currently.

Update: Obviously, we are not as an informed age as I thought because when a bunch of locals saw me wearing my Ressence Type 3 Watch, they chucked me in a well amongst chants of “witchcraft”. Luckily I didn’t sink like a witch because I wear my inflatable armbands everywhere I go to cover for just such an eventuality. I get chucked in a lot of wells.

Ressence watch back



Me: Hello, NASA.

NASA: Not you again…

Me: Yeah, but wait, I’ve got a good one for you this time…

NASA: Go on…

Me: Yeah, so, I’ve just seen a UFO…

NASA: Really? Where?

Me: My wrist…


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